Sunday, July 12

10 Reasons Why THE LAST DRAGON Rules Your Bitch Ass

10. Whatever the fuck is in Arkadian's fish tank.

09. This frame.

08. William H. Macy stylin' and profilin' with shades and rad jacket as Vanity's agent.

07. Angela's atrocious "Dirty Boys" music video.

06. Bruce being enamored with getting his amulet back, despite being alone with Vanity.

05. Bruce's sensi totally bullshitting the purpose of his quest.

04. Vanity being a vastly better actress than what actually made her famous...or maybe it was just the china white.

03. The movie theater sequence; Enter the Dragon, spontaneous breaking accompanied with boombox breaking, transvestite yelling, and the best delivery of "nigga please" in cinema history.

02. "Who plays this garbage?" might piss your pants upon witnessing this.

01. "Who's da masta?" Yep, going with the obvious. The biggest draw is Julius Carry's hilariously over-the-top Sho'nuff, The Shogun of Harlem. It's like lightening striking when the character embodies the screen. Sure, Bruce makes him his bitch in the end, but damn does Carry do most of the heavy-lifting in transporting this film into bonafide '80s cult classic status.


Unknown said...

Agreed! There's probably many more reasons as well, but these are great choices.

Anonymous said...

Fuck yes! Eddie Arkadian is easliy one of the coolest character names ever. He reminds me a bit of "The Mighty Boosh's" Bob Fossil. This was one of those movies I used to watch repeatedly on HBO during high school, which incidentally was an experience in itself, being educated by the likes of Home Box Office and Cinemax way back when. It also found a warm place in my in this panelologists' heart when "The Glow" was what I imagined living the life of Iron Fist would be like. At least, until I saw the prison break finale to THE STORY OF RICKY.

wiec? said...

HELL YEAH! awesome post for a childhood favorite.

the catches bullets with his teeth part is nutso crazy too. great list.

Thomas Pluck said...

11. Eating popcorn with chopsticks!

I love this movie and gave it the full treatment a while back. I heard rumors of a remake with Samuel L. Jackson as Sno 'Nuff. If it must happen, I think he's a decent choice, but Terry Crews would be funnier.

KFelon said...

I've never heard of this. So embarrassingly enough I'll buy this soon and check it out.

Fan Tribute to The Last Dragon said...

Great list for a grea movie. I run a fan tribute for The Last Dragon blog. I will share this badass list on our Facebook & Twitter pages. you dare tread upon the staircase?

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