Thursday, July 2

Enough To Kill A Mofo: SNUFF (1976)


Talk about the raging hemorrhoids on the anus of dreck. This is seventy-five minutes of attractive ladies and druggy satanic meanderings wrapped up in a stunning gift box that explodes in an arrant spray of diseased feline bowel excitement upon opening within the last five minutes. If I would have endured this without knowing the marketing hook at the conclusion, just like the title says, I would have wanted to create snuff upon the nearest living organism (besides myself) having utterly wasted eighty minutes. This flick is tantamount to the sinking feeling after you inadvertently tune to the Spice Channel after just trying to turn up Blues Clues for your kids.

I cannot imagine the seat-destroying rage experienced afterward if I saw this in its heyday at a 42nd Street grindhouse. I would have beat the fuck out of the annoying prostitute to my left, screamed at the asshole constantly tossing off in the back row, and thrown my week old popcorn at the loose screen as I stomped off on the cum-stained carpeting.

Thankfully, I only watched the first fifteen and fast-forwarded to the seventy minute mark to witness the most ineffective kill scene in history. Some guy who sounds like Chris Penn cuts up a chick with a knife and electric saw. Thick, ultra bright "blood" flows while the woman screams and eventually sorta kinda dies. Also apparently one can pull a woman's still beating heart and intestine out of her vagina if so inclined. He then holds the guts up for the camera and screams as the film runs off the sprockets. Vida es muerte my ass.

Though I will say for a 27 year old VHS, Cult Video's presentation looks fantastic.
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5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I reviewed this awhile ago. I actually watched the whole thing...twice! It was terrible, though the dubbing was hilarious.

Unknown said...

Wow, I have to check this out, if only for the sheer ridiculousness that you pointed out.

Drunketh said...

Yeah, Snuff pissed me off as well. What a cheap ass tacked on ending to a Charles Manson story style flick. Huh.

the jaded viewer said...

It's infamous for that tacked on last scene. I'm sure Charlie Sheen thought it was actual snuff.

Jayson Kennedy said...

Hahaha!

...do you dare tread upon the staircase?

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