Saturday, February 14

American Commandos (1985)


Directed by Bobby A. Suarez
88 Minutes /Lightning Video / Unmatted Full Frame

Seriously take Death Wish, a pinch of Rambo 2 or 3 (with no hostage), a touch of The Blues Brothers, set it in Singapore, and let boil in a stew of "this friggin' sucks eggs" for ninety minutes.

After a Vietnam vet's family is raped and murdered by a drug gang, he decides to take revenge upon the killers in the form of a Snubnose. The local detective is in on the man's vigilante justice and proposes he travel to Thailand to root out and crush the cause of the town's cocaine problem (yeah I know, what the hell?!?)...or face a long sentence. The vet agrees and after landing goes to each of his ex-squad members to try and convince them to join him. Double crosses, little brown men twirling around from machine gun fire, stupid looking battle vehicles, and smoke pot explosions then smash your sense of excitement's testicles with a swift kick.

...and that's it. Throw it in the damn dumpster why don' cha?

Film: 2/10
VHS Picture: 6/10
VHS Sound: 2/10

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...do you dare tread upon the staircase?

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